When Push Comes To Love

"When Push Comes To Love"
Matthew 1:18-25

Joseph needed to talk to someone.  He was getting nowhere on his own.  But who could he talk to?  Whoever it would be needed to be a good listener.  He could talk to his brother, but his brother would have flown off the handle.  Joseph could talk to his mother, but, well, you know how Jewish mothers are.  All problems, no matter how awful, can be solved with a good meal.  "Eat, eat; you'll feel better," she would tell Joseph.  But eating was the last thing on Joseph's mind.

Who could he talk to, then?  Suddenly, he thought of the perfect person.  She would be just right in a weird sort of way.  When Joseph and Mary were just children, they were matched with each other by a matchmaker.  Yeshiva had made the match and negotiated the deal with Joseph and Mary's fathers.


So Joseph went back to Yeshiva the Matchmaker.  Maybe she could help him find some insight into his awful dilemma.

Yeshiva was a contradiction to her craft.  She had never gotten married.  The boy she was matched with was killed when he was 12 years old.  He had been kicked in the head by a mule, so Yeshiva never married.  She turned her life over to God and the holy work of matchmaking, making her assignments, just as God had assigned Eve to Adam.  She spent most of her time watching the children play, and the insights she gained were uncanny.

Joseph had always thought of Yeshiva as old when he was a child.  He had no idea how old she was now, but ancient was a good description.  She wrapped her long, thin, gray hair into a faded head scarf.  She wore so many layers of wraps and tunics, it was hard to tell what shape her body actually was.  She blended in with the children so well, because she wasn't much taller than most of them.

Yeshiva had "welcome" written across her face by the way she smiled.  You could tell Yeshiva anything without fear because it was like she had heart it all before.  She had the wisdom of God, knowing exactly what to say or what not to say.

Joseph found Yeshiva sitting near the well watching the children play in the water.  He sat down beside her on a low wall and didn't say anything for a while.  He had a longing look on his face as he watched the children—a look that wished for those simple times again.

"Why are you not happy, Joseph?" Yeshiva asked, still with her eyes on the children.
"I didn't say I was unhappy," Joseph replied.  "In fact, I haven't said anything at all."
"You don't need to say anything," Yeshiva said.  "Your face says it all.  And the way you walk.  Your whole body is telling me something heavy has been lain across your spirit."
Joseph exhaled through his nose.
"See!  Even your breathing tells me," she said.
Joseph was silent for a time.  "It's Mary," he finally said.
"What, you don't like the match now that you are betrothed?  She is a great match for you!"  Now, Yeshiva turned to look Joseph in the face.  "In fact, your match was one of the best I have ever done.  Schlem and Hannah, not so good of a match.  But you and Mary—the best!"
"It has been good—until now."
"What, did you have your first fight?  Poor Joseph.  You are finally finding out what married life is really like.  Not all this kissy, kissy, giggly stuff."
"It's more than a fight, Yeshiva."
"Tell me," she said more softly.
"She's pregnant," Joseph murmured.  "Pregnant!" he almost shouted, to the point that the children stopped playing and looked over at him.
"Congratulations!" Yeshiva brightened.  "How could this be such a problem?"
"The baby's not mine," Joseph replied with his head hanging down.  "There's no way I can be the father, because we haven't, uh, you know."
"Oy, vey," Yeshiva said raising her hands in the air.  "This isn't the first time in the history of the world that such a things has happened."
"I'm afraid it is," Joseph replied dryly.
"What, you are trying to tell me a girl hasn't come up with child out of wedlock before?  Where have you been living?  I just didn't think May would ever be that kind of girl."
"I don't think she is either," Joseph said.
"Well open your eyes, young man.  Her belly will soon be telling you she is."
"She told me she's still a virgin."
"Yah, sure, and if that's true, I'm still a teenager," Yeshiva giggled.
"She said God has made her with child."
Yeshiva let out a loud, one-syllable laugh.  "HA!  That's a good one.  I have not, myself, heard that one before.  Blame it on God!  HA!  At least she is creative, this Mary is."
"It's awfully outlandish, isn't it?" Joseph replied.
"Her brain has become dried up like figs," Yeshiva said with a bit of anger in her tone.  "She will not make a fool of you, Joseph.  I will take this marriage contract away.  You will be free to find another."
"I don't want another," Joseph said with a sad but determined look on his face.
"What!?" Yeshiva exhaled.  "What are you saying?"
"I still love her."
"But you can't go through with this," Yeshiva said.  "I can understand you have feelings for her.  So, you want to spare her disgrace; I see.  You are a good man, Joseph.  She doesn't deserve you.  We can do this quietly, then.  I can find two witnesses, have them sign the document, and then…"
"No!" Joseph interrupted.  "No, no.  I don't want any documents.  I don't want to put her away."
"What!?" Yeshiva exhaled again, but this time with a sly smile on her face.  "Certainly you are not telling me you believe her story?"
"That's just the problem," Joseph said, hanging his head, staring at the little pile of dirt he was pushing together with his feet.  "I do.  I think I do believe her."  Yeshiva just sat and stared at him.  "I know, I know," Joseph went on.  "It doesn't make sense; and at the same time it makes all the sense in the world."  He sat silently for a while and finally said, "Because when it comes down to it for me, it's about her.  It's about Mary.  I don't know about all the God stuff.  I don't know if I really believe God is making her have this baby.  I don't know what I believe about God.  I only know what I believe about her.  Is she true or not?  Does she have the kind of purity of heart to back up such a claim?  I ask myself those questions over and over, and every time I come up with the same answer:  Yes.  Yes, to both questions.  I just know I believe in her."

Yeshiva shook her head in affirmation, and put one of Joseph's calloused hands in hers.  "Sometimes," Yeshiva said, "believing in another person is the beginning of belief in God.  If you can't trust God, or you can't believe, then trust in Mary's trust in God; believe in Mary's belief, and let that carry you for the time being."
Yeshiva gave Joseph's hand a squeeze, and then said, "Let me tell you a story.  A long time ago, I was sitting in a spot like this one watching children playing.  Most of them would point their fingers and laugh.  They would imitate my walk, and they would find a boy and a girl and make them stand together.  They would raise a stick over their precious heads, pretending it was my cane and say, 'The deal has been sealed.'  Then they would giggle and run off to play house or something.
"Most of the children were afraid of me, except one little girl.  She would come and sit beside me and tell me about her dreams.  One day, she came and sat as usual.  She said, 'Yesuva (she couldn't pronounce my name), Yesuva, I had such a dream last night.'  I said, 'Tell me about it child.'  She said, 'I dreamed that God came down from above and woke me up.  God picked me up and took me up to heaven, where we played and played.  I had so much fun.  Then, when I was tired, God brought me back to my bed, and waited until I fell asleep.  Then God went back to heaven.'
"Then she jumped down from the bench and ran back into the circle of children to play.  She didn't ask me what the dream meant like she usually did.  It was as if she already knew the answer and she had, in her childish innocence, accepted the wonder of it."
Yeshiva and Joseph sat on the low wall watching two little boys throwing rocks, to see who could throw the furthest.  Joseph asked, "And that little girl was…"
"You know who that little girl was," Yeshiva replied.
"So all along you have known that God would do something powerful through her; that in her dreams God was preparing her for what was to come?"
"Yes," Yeshiva replied.
"And when you made the match when we were children, you knew."
"Yes."
"So why did you choose me for her.  What could you have possibly seen in me that would befit such a person as Mary?" Joseph asked.
"Because, my dear boy," as Yeshiva patted Joseph on the arm, "you have always been someone who has done the right thing, no matter how difficult.  And I knew when the day would come when God would place his hand upon Mary again, that you would be the only one who would think long enough to do the right thing."
As Joseph smoothed out the little mound of dirt with his foot, Yeshiva finally asked, "So, Joseph, what are you going to do?"
Joseph thought for half a second, smiled, stood, straightened himself, and replied, "The right thing, Yeshiva.  I'm going to do the right thing."