Grow Up

"Grow Up"
1 Corinthians 3:1-9

When I was looking for a picture for this weeks bulletin, they were along two different themes.  There were a lot of pictures and quotes that had to do with the idea that we should never grow up.  That is, we should always let the child in us run free and unfettered.  That we could become too stodgy and adultish, and should never give in to such a thing.  I somewhat agree with that.

But…but…there was another theme to the pictures and quotes I found when looking for a bulletin picture, that were more like the one I finally decided to use.  They told the truth that like it or not, oh those of you who want to remain child-like your whole lives (and I'm sorry to be the one who has to tell you this) there comes the time in the story of your life that you need to grow up.  You need to mature.  You have to be an adult and take care of adult decisions and life choices that come your way.

Jennifer uses the term, "adulting," when trying to describe circumstances she is facing that calls for her to have to be an adult, but doesn't want to be.     For example, Jennifer likes to shop.  But Jennifer has a limited amount of income.  So, at those moments when she is shopping but can't buy something because her new budget won't allow it, that is an adulting moment.  Or when she has to make some big girl purchases, like certain kinds of insurance, or making investments in setting up long term savings plans—those are somewhat "painful" adulting moments.  She put up on her Facebook page recently a picture with the caption, "You is tired.  You is broke.  You is adulting."

So "adulting" is facing those times when you realize you can't allow the child in you to have its way all the time, and you just have to grow up.  Paul, at this point in his letter to the Corinthians, is trying to have one of those adult, instructive moments.  He's frustrated because the Corinthian Christians are just not getting the adulting thing as it relates to their faith in Christ.

Becoming a Christian is a process of growing up—what Paul calls maturing from being people of the flesh, or people of the world, to spiritual people.  Paul recognizes this is a long growth process.  We don't get to go from birth to adult in a matter of hours, and neither will we be able to do the same in our Christian growth.  But nevertheless, that kind of growth and maturity has to happen.  We have to grow up in our relationship with the Lord.

I've been watching a lot of nature documentaries on Netflix lately.  You know, we live in an amazing world.  So much variety and creativity God has designed into this world.  Anyway, there are some animals who have to make that fast transition of growing up.  Wildebeests, once they are born, have only a matter of minutes to get up on their feet and start running.  If they don't, they get left behind, since wildebeests are constantly on the move.  Also, if the baby doesn't get up and get moving, they become some predators dinner that night.

Humans take so long to mature.  To grow up.  For example, the prefrontal cortex—this front part of our brains—control the abilities to differentiate among conflicting thoughts, determine the difference between good and bad, better and best, same and different; this part of our brain helps us figure out the future consequences of our current behaviors;  this part of our brain is what we use when setting goals and how to work towards accomplishing them; and finally, this prefrontal cortex helps us control and suppress behavioral urges, regulating impulse control so we don't do too many stupid, impulsive acts.  But this amazingly important part of our brain isn't fully developed until we are around 25 years old.

So when we yell at our kids, "What were you thinking!!? they can respond, "I guess I wasn't thinking, and I won't be able to until I'm 25.  Get used to that."

One of my favorite Calvin and Hobbes cartoons shows Calvin banging away with a hammer on the top of the living room coffee table.  Calvin's mom comes in screaming, "What are you doing!?"
To which Calvin replies, "Is this a trick question?"

Even though "growing up" is a long process for we humans, waiting for parts of us to catch up with the rest of us, we still have to do that.  Paul wrote that at some point, babies have to make the transition from mother's milk to solid food.  That's part of growing up.  Paul's figurative language is making the point that when we become Christians, we are sustaining ourselves on basic teachings of Christ and learning simple lessons about the Christian life.  But we don't get to stay there.  We don't get to ride the tricycle of basic Christian teachings.  At some point we have to get off the trike, and master the more intricate balance of riding a two-wheeled bicycle of the growing up life in the Christian way.


Paul wrote in this part of the letter to the Corinthians that there are a couple of human characteristics that get in the way of our growing up.

The first is jealousy.  The word in Greek that Paul used is the same word behind our English word, zealous.  Being zealous has to do with feeling the heat of adoration.  Zeal is the amount of energy and enthusiasm we put into pursuing some thing or some one.  Passion might be another good word to describe this kind of zeal.  It's a very positive word.

But, just as a person can burn with passion, that burning—that heat—can get out of control.  You can get to the point of wanting to be the only one who gets to claim the object of your passion.

Two shopkeepers were bitter rivals. Their stores were directly across the street from each other, and they would spend each day keeping track of each other's business. If one got a customer, he would smile in triumph at his rival. One night an angel appeared to one of the shopkeepers in a dream and said, "I will give you anything you ask, but whatever you receive, your competitor will receive twice as much. Would you be rich? You can be very rich, but he will be twice as wealthy. Do you wish to live a long and healthy life? You can, but his life will be longer and healthier. What is your desire?" The man frowned, thought for a moment, and then said, "Here is my request: Strike me blind in one eye!"

That's the heart of zealousness that gets out of control.  It only wants for itself, and doesn't want anyone else to have what you desire.  It's that jealousy of all others who get, even just a little more than you and it seems so unfair.

You lie to yourself that you are the only one who cares so much.  You are the only one who understands that your zeal and devotion are the best.  You are the only one who deserves the object of your desire.  The good side of zealousness has all gone rotten within you, which infects the whole.  Which is what was happening in Corinth.  An over zealous few was bringing immaturity and the inability to grow in the faith to the whole community.

But if you can keep that zeal in check, the whole community is infected with your good choices and the power of positive desire that would benefit all, helping all to grow up.

For many years Sir Walter Scott was the leading literary figure in the British Empire. No one could write as well as he. Then the works of Lord Byron began to appear, and their greatness was immediately evident. Soon an anonymous critic praised Lord Byron's poems in a London Paper. This critic declared that in the presence of these brilliant works of poetic genius, Scott could no longer be considered the leading poet of England. It was later discovered that the unnamed reviewer had been none other than Sir Walter Scott himself!  That's the attitude of a healthy zeal--not wanting everything for yourself, but sharing a zeal for the best in others.

The other characteristic that Paul mentioned, that is keeping the Christian community at Corinth from growing up was strife, or being argumentative.  Strife, like zeal, starts out as a good quality.  It starts out as a healthy debate.  It was the attempt to have a civil conversation about two opposing viewpoints.

Instead of remaining there, the debate turned into contentiousness, wrangling, and strife.  One side may use a trigger word.  Or one pushes the other's button, because they know where to push.  The strife heats up.  Then all civility is lost.  Community breaks down, as others are pulled into verbal battle, and sides are taken.

Two men who lived in a small village got into a terrible dispute that they could not resolve. So they decided to talk to the town sage. The first man went to the sage's home and told his version of what happened. When he finished, the sage said, "You're absolutely right." The next night, the second man called on the sage and told his side of the story. The sage responded, "You're absolutely right." Afterward, the sage's wife scolded her husband. "Those men told you two different stories and you told them they were absolutely right. That's impossible -- they can't both be absolutely right." The sage turned to his wife and said, "You're absolutely right."

When in the middle of some verbal jousting that is getting out of hand, one of the most important questions to ask yourself is, "Is it better than I'm right, or is it better that I sustain the relationship?"  You can't have both.  So you have to make a wise decision.

That's what Paul was trying to get the Corinthians to see.  They weren't growing up in their faith, they weren't building their relationship with Christ or each other, because each of them had to be blasted right.  Is Paul the most important apostle?  Is Peter?  Is Apollos?  That's what they were arguing about.  But it's a who cares argument.  Which ever answer you fall on won't help you grow up.  It will only keep you childish and immature.  And the whole Christian community in Corinth, or anywhere else, will suffer for it.